Scary Shit: When Loved Ones Are Hurt

Posted: December 28, 2014 in Pushing my buttons!, Rocks in my path
Tags: , , , ,

Not many things scare me but the things that do, thankfully don’t occur often. At the top of my “Scares the Bajeezus Out of me” list is losing a loved one and seeing a loved one hurt. And whaddya know, recently, I got that dreadful call. My loved one was hurt. I was scared. Now I’m still a bit angry but most of all, I love a little deeper, a little harder. Hey, love isn’t a depleting life resource so why not just give away as much as you can?  Note to the authorities: This is not advocating prostitution. Thanks for your understanding.

Okay to get back to the point, I’m also thankful. Yes, I’m thankful that she is alive and will heal. Thankful that I could tell her how much she means to me and that she should never do this scary shit ever again!

I really thought she was calling just to say “Hi” and just seeing her name on my phone’s screen made my smile. But with that one tiny “Hey” I knew something was wrong and I felt like an asshole for answering the phone so happily thinking of how inappropriate it must have seemed to her ears at that time.

As I was rushing to get to her all I could think about was how horrible life would be without her.

When I finally made it to the hospital I had spoken to not only the main entrance’s overly happy welcoming committee (didn’t anyone tell them it was a hospital?!) and to the emergency room nurses but no one knew who she was and claimed that no one was brought in from a car accident. Oh goody it got better.

But the conundrums were real. The police officer on the scene wouldn’t give me information on her condition, and the hospital party crew who I swear were about to do the wave to celebrate everyone walking through the door informed me that even if they found her, depending on where she was moved in the hospital, there were no guarantees that I’d be able to see her because we weren’t related. Yes, it was threatening to become a saga and it wasn’t even 10 AM yet. And yeah you guessed it, I was about to become the sister from another mother if needed. Talk about frustrated!

But I was angry too. Angry that a young person wasn’t paying attention and didn’t have the human decency to ask if she was okay after slamming a big ass Ford Expedition into the back of our smaller than a Ford Expedition SUV. Keep in mind that he was apparently okay enough to exit his vehicle to survey his smashed up front. But couldn’t give a measly rat’s ass to find out whether the person he almost killed was in need of help. I hope his ass burns and itches at the most inappropriate times for hours on end without relief. 😒

As I was trying to get to her before the ambulance left, I became stonewalled in a sea of traffic due to the crashed vehicles blocking a couple of lanes of traffic. After thinking about the possible repercussions of driving illegally on the shoulder of the road, I decided that that’s what the emergency shoulder was for so I turned off the regular lane and onto the shoulder with my hazard lights on. There I had the joy of encountering a foul mouthed young male asshole in a dark blue Honda Civic with Pennsylvania tags (that I wish I took a picture of!) who blocked the shoulder as he gave me the universal “Fuck you” symbol with the raised middle finger. Of course if he couldn’t go anywhere, neither should I. I rolled down my window and explained that I was trying to get to the accident. I begged him to move back into his lane so I could go on. He finally moved after about three precious minutes had passed. As I went by he screamed, “That better be your loved one dying up there!”. Yes, he actually said “dying”. It took everything in me to only curse at him, admittedly, and not give his smug assholish face the makeover he deserved, with the help of my nine iron expertise. However, I did throw a coffee to him so he’d have something to drink as he waited. What? I didn’t want to leave him thirsty.

But in spite of it all, knowing she’s safe (and heavily medicated at times) the only energy I have left is going towards love. I hope love will be enough to patch the little piece of my heart which was chipped away this morning with her tiny, shaken up, “Hey”. Who knew one word could break a human?.

But, this isn’t a sad story. She’s alive and will heal. No thanks to the asshole from Pennsylvania who delayed me getting to the accident nor to the person who slammed into the back of our vehicle (which was considered a total loss die to the extent of the damage). Fuckers.

So what does all of this have to do with anything? Nothing and everything. It’s just me sharing my recent life events and reminding you not to take life or your loved ones for granted. Oh and please don’t be an asshole. You never know what someone is going through and when that said someone will challenge your face to a one on one golf match. 

Oh and for those of you who have family members who are not considered immediate family in the eyes of the law, get a legal agreement because you may need it if your life changes in the blink of a red brake light. But I hope you never have to blink.

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